What is a committed relationship like?

Most people say that it is when you don't fuck someone else and most of the time you only see one person. However, when you are see one person it should also mean that when you say something about what you are going to do you follow up with it. Problem is that if you are with a practicing addict, like I am, then addict got a different idea of what it means to say going to do something. If they are offer drugs then it should be understood and ok that they changed their mind. The only promise that you can count on from a practicing addict is that you will be lied too.

Since I know that how long do I give in and let it be ok. It no longer is ok and tired of the heart ache. I have no excuses for allowing the heart ache to continue. I know that I love her and she has made some changes but then starts leaving again. She got excuses like I am not there, it her mates and she just got too. I also know that she loves me but I also understand that her addiction is stronger than her love for me.

No matter what I know and understand it still hurts terribly. She has no real idea what it feels like when she says she got out her mates because they are her mates and she never going to leave them no matter what harm it does. I to the point right now that I think that it might be best for me to let her go. She tells me that she knows that being with me is a better life but the coke is more fun. Well, there was a time when I thought our life together was going to be great but now it is too painful. Our business is finally starting to really do good but I can't take her taking money to get high and then making excuses why she can't do the posting like she said she do.

She's got no real clue of the harm she is doing to me or anyone else. Last week she lied to me all week and I know she was but I am not there to point out. When she came clean about it sent to a place in our relationship that I had been to in a long time. Right now I don't trust her and feel that she is fucking someone. She maybe only blowing them sometimes to get free drugs and I think it is all for drugs. So, it comes down to how much longer I can take it?

She is moving to her own flat in about a week and half which she think will make a big difference but I'm not so sure. I am to the point where my hope for our future is about dead.

Freedom from the anger of the Pharisees

Freedom from anger comes from remembering that Christ is the Judge of the everyone. The religious leaders in the time of Christ thought God had given them the right to tell people what God wanted them to do or what they had been doing wrong. Today that is the Holy Spirit's job and we are to come along with them to support them.

Interesting fact that in Acts 10:39 disciples say they were told to let everyone know that He, Christ Jesus was to be the Judge of the living and the dead. If He wanted everyone to know that could it be that we are to judge others. Somewhere else in the Bible it says that man just on the outside but God judges the heart. Again, it says to test the teaching not to prove that someone is a false teacher but to protect ourselves with His Sword and shield.

“For the LORD is our judge, the LORD is our lawgiver, the LORD is our king; it is he who will save us.” Isaiah 33:22 NIV
I find it interesting how people could read Scripture, really read it, and still believe they have the right to tell others how to believe. I know that I have done this so I not speaking as someone who innocent of such acts. I am grateful that Jesus has allowed me to see when I have stepped over the line. Today I can discuss spiritual issues and if they get to a point where it becomes a battle to end it.

I couldn't think of a good title for this.

The last month and half has been hell with my HYOPP and this last week has been the worst. My head feels heavy and dozy but I can't sleep during the day. The attacks on my legs are lasting longer.